Keira Coates

Reparenting Coach

Learn Tips to Reparent in Order to Go After Your Dreams

https://wearesoulsimple.com

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Where did your passion start?  It started in 2003 when she learned about a non-profit that was teaching social and emotional learning in the inner city of NYC.  She cried and couldn’t stop.  She had 6 traumas happen to her by the time she was 9 years old.  Wow.  My life would have been different if she had had this program.  She started teaching in a gang neighborhood.  Her energy was the most important thing that made the most impact.  She is not going anywhere and she made it a point.  She changed peoples lives.  She grew apart because she had different values.  She studied resiliency and got her masters degree.  Children are rarely the problem.  Parents do the best that they can but they are missing skills.  They are missing being seen and heard.  She felt like in order to help children, she needed to work with the parents.  They are limiting their ability to connect because of their own shame and pain.  It opens up doors in their lives.  They can show up and be more visible.  

Parents find a sense of relief.  She wants to debunk that things are carried on from generation to generation.  She was scared she had a monster inside of her.  We have a fear of not creating the same mistakes.  She works on specific areas.  It is a relief.  “I am my father’s daughter”.  Dena has a friend who says that.  I am who I am because of my genes.  Is this your coat?  

If you grow up in an environment where you have to take care of others, a lot of your energy is about protecting yourself.  Most of the women want to shift energy from protection to moving outwards.  You need to understand your responses and change them.  This is about the nervous system.  Regulate your hormones first.  Get sleep, eat right and then you can have reactions but you will feel a sense of balance.  You don’t feel constant chaos.  You will feel stability in your body.  You make choices from being more grounded.  The more safe you feel, the more willing you will be to have a conversation.  The more grounded the more the other person will respond to you in a good way.  

Learning to regulate your emotions is a long term game.  Get someone to come down to you instead of escalate.  She works on people with relationships with themselves.  Where do you have a desire that you are not bringing to light?  How do you hold ourselves back?  There is a story behind that.  

Dena shares a story.  If that person can do it, I can do it.  This is a powerful tool.  Why is this holding you back?  This is self discovery.

Is this a systematic approach?  Each person has their own process and outcomes.  It is a different path. 

There are 8 pillars of re-parenting.  It will show up if you are lacking.  One of them is being celebrated.  If you don’t have that, you become a drama queen or you don’t share anything.  

What about if you have one parent that celebrates?

Laura Grace Grier Travel Podcast is up next!

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How comfortable are you with praise?  This is what it comes down to.  It would affect what you saw as the gender roles. 

There is nothing wrong with getting attention.  The point is whether you can give and receive attention.  

Is part of this visualization where you imagine your perfect parents?  That is who Keira wants to be.  That is her goal.  She recommends that.  

It is good if you are working on something and sit down and write down what your ideal mother and father would do to support you.  She finds that people are showing up.  The victim stories disappear.  She finds things that she can do for herself.

Will the victim go away?  It always comes up.  The point is not to fix yourself but it is about support for you to step into your limitations so you can achieve the things that are important to you.  This is the first time in history where people have tools to look at their emotions in different ways.  This is a huge opportunity to change generational stories.  Or to become women that this world has never seen before.  

When you get the things you want and people trickle off.  What happens there?  Our relationships offer us opportunities to expand where we are.  Everything is just feedback.  If you don’t get attention from someone, meet them at their level.  

She doesn’t like cancel culture.  Friends get jealous. Give them space.  She won’t go to them for support but she still cares for them.  You can get your needs met in other places.  

Invest time and energy where people meet you.  Keira doesn’t want relationships that are based on lack.  

Keira lived in Argentina.  Have more relationships in your life!  In America we move around a lot and we leave families.  Our circle gets larger but smaller.  You need to learn different things from different people.  The advice is to have lots of relationships.  Don’t put all your eggs in one basket.  Invest in relationships.  

Keira experienced a recent tragedy and it was a friend from elementary school that gave her advice.  It was someone that knew her for a long time.  All relationships have different roles in our lives.  

How can someone work with you?  

Wearesoulsimple

3 month program

Intensive on visibility

She shares on Instagram

She does training on relationship skills

She can work you, one on one

Relationships are wealth.  Invest in them!  You will receive dividends!

Parting words?  She wants to encourage women to honor their dreams and the best way is to shine your light and put yourself out there.  You give permission to everyone around you to shine their light brighter!  Say yes to yourself and enjoy yourself!

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Tired of feeling overwhelmed, stagnant or undervalued in your career?  We worked with Janice Dru-Bennett and her Career Shift Lift System and we were blown away.  We knew we were worth more.  We wanted to break through to the next level.  Like you, we have gone through change. This program helps you respond to unexpected changes especially in a pandemic.

All you need is commitment and desire to grow.  

Do you want to take on a different function, enter a new industry, or expand what you do?

Are you tired of doing what you’re doing now and are looking for energy through change that can propel you forward to achieve the dreams that you’ve always imagined?

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Step-by-step in 6 weeks time you will create a roadmap, expand your network, get results and have an endless lift upwards. You will gain direct access to resources, tools and networks to help with your career shift. Let your value shine! ~Colleen & Dena, iSoulify

SIGN UP HERE!!!!!!!

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Tina Mundelsee

Yoga Therapist, Life & Relationship Coach, Author

Learn the key to your mind and create the emotions you want

https://tinastools.com/

Dream Big, work hard, smile always and good things will happen.

We want to hear from you at isoulify.com

Tina lives in Sicily, Italy!

Where was your passion born?

She grew up in Germany in a small village. She explored nature and played outside all the time. Her grandparents encouraged her with their attitude. She looked at all the details in nature. Intuition is natural and comes to you. She started exploring the world and lived in different countries. Everywhere she went, she questioned why people did what they did. It was hard to understand people. She was curious about life. It doesn’t matter where you come from. We all have the same problem. The problem is our mind. Every problem starts with our mind. She got deeper into yoga philosophy. She realized if she approached people with a coaching point of view would not scare people with the spirituality jargon.

Dena talks about giant oak trees. This is how she wants to live her life.

How do you help somebody learn how to connect with nature? Change the perception of life. We believe to be our mind. We are all energy. We are souls and divine beings. We are all gifted the gift of life. We have a body and a mind. We are not the mind. Humans identify with their mind. They feel they are separate from everything that exists. The imprint of nature comes into play. We are not different from nature. We are part of it. Everything in nature works harmoniously. We are more than our physical body. We have to balance our bodies. We have water and fire and the elements. We need to be aware.

She explains to her customers about their instruments. If you don’t like your colleague it is because they have different beliefs. You have a certain idea of how you want life to be. What about expectations? There is a partnership that we have to find.

The solution to everything is to remember who you are. You are not your mind. The resistance comes from your mind. Your mind is your instrument. You are a soul making a human experience. Your mind has a belief that certain rules have to be followed. You have a choice of how to react. You are not a victim. You cannot control and change other people. Be aware of your thoughts. Be the observer of your mind. You can change your thoughts. You can respond with indifference or calmness.

Once you connect with your thoughts you become indifferent. You let them pass through your being. Where do I want to go with my thoughts? Do you want to be harmonious?

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ADVERTISEMENT for Janice Dru-Bennett’s Exceptional Program

Tired of feeling overwhelmed, stagnant or undervalued in your career? We worked with Janice Dru-Bennett and her Career Shift Lift System and we were blown away. We knew we were worth more. We wanted to break through to the next level. Like you, we have gone through change. This program helps you respond to unexpected changes especially in a pandemic.

All you need is commitment and desire to grow.

Do you want to take on a different function, enter a new industry, or expand what you do?

Are you tired of doing what you’re doing now and are looking for energy through change that can propel you forward to achieve the dreams that you’ve always imagined?

YOU know that you can turn your vision into a reality!

This girl, Janice, has figured it out, so you don’t have to. And you don’t have to do it alone!

Step-by-step in 6 weeks time you will create a roadmap, expand your network, get results and have an endless lift upwards. You will gain direct access to resources, tools and networks to help with your career shift. Let your value shine! ~Colleen & Dena, iSoulify

SIGN UP HERE!!!!!!!

https://janicedrubennett.podia.com/career-shift-lift-system/1psix

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You need an objective in life. The underlying common desire is freedom and peace in all people. Everything we do should be around our goal. Then you know what to do. See your mind as a computer. No one explains to you how to operate your mind. We are the most evolved being.

Your mind has four parts. The lowest part is your senses. These senses bring back impressions. They go to the external world. You see a chocolate cake. A desire is created. Then your mind has storage. I remember the cake. The ego. The beliefs and your values and good and bad. Ego says I love chocolate cake. It makes me happy. That is where the story ends. Your mind has an intellect. Your ability to decide and discriminate. The cake is great but you are on a diet and you should not get it. You respond responsibly. How do you train? Change your language. My mind is this. My body is this. You create a distance. Take the I out of it. You ask yourself, who Am I? Then you meditate. Just sit and observe your thoughts and how your body is feeling. Doing nothing. Slowly you will realize that you are not your mind. Then you will know that you can take responsibility for what is happening in your mind. This content in your mind is how you experience life. We learned about the power of the mind and healing. You can use visualization.

How can we create a new reality?

We believe we only have a physical body. We have an energetic body. Energy vibrates. Energy attracts similar energy. You can’t touch it. What you create in your mind is a vibration. There is a law of attraction. If you vibrate anger you attract anger. You have to let go of the idea that we cannot control life.

The oak tree weathers the storm and digs deep into the earth and has roots. Humans can get stuck on how things are supposed to be and life doesn’t unfold the way we want it to.

How does our own spirituality play out when we have no control?

Everything you want is a desire. It comes from your mind. You are not your mind. Let it talk. Let it be upset. When you grow up your mind is formed. Every ego makes the experience that it can’t control everything. You are a soul. That is the foundation for life. You will not find lasting peace, the suffering will come back if you let your mind run your life. Who am I? This will bring your answers. It could take five years. You have innate intelligence. If you learn how to use your mind to function, then you just accept life joyfully as it is. Don’t identify as a belief anymore. You will know your true self. You are yoga. You have to remember.

Tina has a book and her projects. Yoga coaching is the name of her book. She wants to share yoga as a way to care for your mind. Tap through into the memory of your body. Movement connects you with your mind and resolves emotional baggage. You don’t even have to step onto a mat! She is preparing an Online course on how to operate your mind. Her course will be done towards the end of the year. Her Facebook group is awakening joy. We all struggle with the same stuff!

Parting words? Don’t take yourself and life too seriously. Try to accept whatever comes joyfully. Be grateful for everything. Aspirational words!

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https://amandapearl.com

Who is a woman owned NYC based accessory company known for its sustainability and ethically made jewelry and clutches that are designed to empower.

We want to hear from you at Facebook or isoulify.com

•.   Where did your passion start?  

There was never an aha moment.  She had an appreciation for aesthetics.  She loved creating something out of nothing.  She had an entrepreneurial spirit.  She did this from a young age.  

• How did you manifest these gifts?  She would collect tiny things and she would create things out of nothing and then sell them door to door.

• Creativity is born when you are free to play outside.  What kind of family did you come from.  She had a lot of freedom.  Her parents left them to her own devices.  It made her creative.

• Was there a time that you were ever not creative?  She brought that into whatever form she had.  She made jewelry and danced.  She painted in college.  In her professional life she started her handbags.  This is how Amanda Pearl was born.

• She also dabbles in music and has a passion for it.  She is learning guitar.  

• What stops you?  Do you have an inner critic.  She is headstrong.  She has a drive and focus to keep going. She keeps trying.

• The message here is to keep going!  She bypassed the critic.  She never gave it the power or voice.  There is a consistency with greatness.  There is a characteristic that you don’t give the negative stuff power.  It allows you to live your passion.

• Do you have advice for our audience?  What is the secret sauce? Do your thing.  Attempt things.  Have fun learning.  Who cares if you are bad?  There is no wrong in art or bad.  It is all an exploration.  That is what life should be.  You are not living if you aren’t exploring.

• How did your process start?  She worked with wire and beads.  She wasn’t trained with metal.  She would sketch and work with jewelers to create her ideas.  She uses artisans to create the jewelry.  You can ask for help.  You don’t have to go it alone.  

• Tell us about the clutches.  She started sewing them herself.  She found a factory in Italy.  She was able to achieve her wildest dreams.  Don’t let your weaknesses hold you back.  They are gorgeous!  

• Tell us about your business.  You have a lot of celebrities that wear your jewelry.  It is just her and one colleague, Kelly Kratus Nelson who is Director of Operations.

They are a good pair.  It has been a long road.

• She worked for others and learned how things work.  She is doing it all herself. She paired down her collections.  Her products are collectible.  She streamlined.  She launched in February of 2008 when retail slipped because of the market crash.  Retail was always on sale.  The customer got trained to wait.  Stores took advantage of designers.  She had too much self worth and value in her product.  She pulled her product out of retail.  She can build it to be exactly how she wanted it to be.  She wanted everything to be eco and green.  She started using recycled metals and unmined gems.  She cut out the middleman.  Her customer would never have to wait.  It is the best price every day of the year.  She wants to highlight causes and organizations.  You can move the needle a little bit.  10% of sales goes to a cause.  She was proud.  This is meaningful.  

•

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• Advice is that it has to be sustainable for you.  Make it make sense.  

• How do you balance production to marketing and in between.  She hired a digital marketing person.  The silver linings of COVID forced her to create her own content.  It is a lot of DIY.  

• She puts pieces of the puzzle together and makes it work.

• She grew up in Seattle.  Her style evolved over time.  She looked at her influences and it comes down to the image of the sea urchin from playing in tide pools when she was young.  She wanted femininity and grace but she loved the armor element.  She wanted you to put something on and feel strong.  The talisman.  The fine jewelry she looked at the physics of waves and the ocean as a feminine power and the ripples from the ocean.  It is about empowering natural elements.  Three is a story for the creative process.

• She has spiritual boxes on her website.  How were those born?  She had a showroom with a shop in the front.  One morning her father didn’t wake up. He was a bright sparkling person and was healthy.  It was a freak thing that he passed in his sleep.  The world stopped spinning and was inside out.  It changed a lot of things.  She discovered a lot through the trauma.  She started doing things to make herself feel better.  She brought them into the shop.  It resonated with people!  The birth of these other categories came out of the loss.  These are gift boxes and they can send it and write a sweet note.  

• She loves the Rumi quote:  The Wound is the Place Where the Light Enters You. 

• How do you get celebrities to wear your things?  You used to work with a PR agency.  We need to capture the hearts of people.  They use social media to have customers respond.  Customers are smart.  They connect with the real person and the story.  How does this align with their own values.  Her work has benefited the bottom line.  Using recycled metals speaks to the customer.  They are on Tik Tok now.  She does Instagram live.  They are real people who wear this stuff.  They are transparent.  It creates a faithful audience.  It creates authenticity.  

• Was it hard to break through the noise of the internet?  It is hard in the digital landscape.  It is crowded.  It is tricky.  It is always changing.  You can never have gone to school for this!  

• When you look to the future, what do you hope and dream.  Her outlook for doing business is all about a sincere straight forward way.  She hopes more brands get on board.  She wants the business to take off more so she can have it be about the causes that are meaningful.  

• Parting words?  It is never too late to shift to try something different.  We are grown ups.  These are our lives.  Make it more enjoyable.  Why not?

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• Carey Kirkella, Photographer
• Learn how to use photography as a storytelling tool to improve self-worth and create mindfulness. 
• https://www.careykirkella.com/ 
• https://www.instagram.com/careykirkella/
• https://www.careykirkella.com/sisters-survivors
• Carey creates custom image libraries for purpose driven missions and entrepreneurs. 
• She is passionate about portraits of breast cancer survivors and their sisters. It is a tribute to her sister, who lost her life to breast cancer. It is also a way to raise awareness about stage IV metastatic breast cancer.
• She is also passionate about mental health
• Dena asks when her passion started. 
• Carey says that photography has been her passion since she was 12 years old. She always used it as a way to help her own mental and emotional health. 
• She got a full scholarship to Pratt Institute in Brooklyn, NY to study photography when she was 18 years old. 
• Dena asks if this fueled her passion even more, or if she became uncertain about her path.
• Carey says that soon after she graduated she was working as an assistant photo editor for the Wall Street Journal. She says it was not a good fit because it was too corporate. She quit after two years. 
• Carey discusses how she worked right across the street from the Twin Towers. Before 9/11, she had an intuitive feeling about something bad happening to the Twin Towers. 
• Dena asks Carey to discuss her intuition.
• Carey says that it comes out of empathy because she is a very empathetic person. She believes empathy goes hand in hand with intuition. 
• At the time, she thought the catastrophe would be a tidal wave or something. She did not know it would be a man-made disaster. This intuitive experience really scared her, and it was a hard time in her life. She had PTSD afterwards. 
• Dena says that empathy can be a gift, but it can also be a challenge. 
• Dena asks Carey to talk about how her photography career advanced after that.
• Carey began with weddings. In 2005, she was working on building her commercial portfolio. She ended up going to a Christian music festival to photograph it. At the time, she was closed minded about a religious music festival, but it ended up being a mind blowing experience in a good and bad way.
• She says that she was in a fragile state, and she wasn’t sleeping much. These two together caused her to have a manic episode and she had to be hospitalized. She was then diagnosed with bipolar disorder. 
• She then started photographing nature as a mindfulness practice to get centered within herself. 
• Dena asks if these skills are essential to be able to cope with mental health problems?
• Carey says that yes, it is essential to have things in one’s toolkit that can help us get through hard times. Being able to fall back on these (music, photography, art, being in nature, etc.) is vital to keep one on track. These are centering activities. 
• Carey says that it is important to do these activities regularly on a daily basis in order to fill up one’s tank and build emotional resilience. These activities are not just a fallback in an emergency, rather they are common practices intertwined into our days and weeks. It is a good foundation to have.  
• Dena then asks Carey to go into discussing her next chapter. 
• Carey says that she did not think about doing anything with the mindfulness photography until recently. 8 years ago her sister passed away from breast cancer and had only been diagnosed 4 months prior. She also had her wedding 1 month after her sister passed away. Carey was hospitalized due to her bipolar disorder following this stressful time in her life.
• A couple years later, she began photographing breast cancer survivors and their sisters. The project is called Sisters and Survivors. It is a tribute to her sister as well as raising awareness for stage IV breast cancer needs more research funding. It only gets 7% of the breast cancer funding research. People do not pass away from breast cancer, they pass away when it spreads to other parts of the body. 
• One of her clients was a woman named Dana Donofree who has a fashion line she created called AnaOno intimates which is lingerie and sleepwear for people who have gone through breast cancer reconstruction surgery.
• Carye began photographing behind the scenes fashion shows as a part of NY fashion week to raise money for organizations that help those with stage IV breast cancer.
• This helped Carey to process her grief around her sister. It also helped her realize how powerful photography is and how empowering it is.
• She then wanted to use photography as a storytelling tool to improve self-worth and create mindfulness. 
• Carey is beginning workshops that teach this practice. She is also talking to the Girl Scouts because she wants to help incorporate it in teens’ lives. She also is talking to an organization that helps those who are 65 and older.
• Dena asks about the logistics of the workshop.
• Carey says that the workshops are about using photography story prompts that are inspired by self awareness, mindfulness, self care, positive relationships, and purpose. Each week, they have a photo story prompt. For example, if it is self care that week, they could do a photo story about the food they are eating and share that within a small group. 
• Carey says that this can just simply be done with their phones. Carey also teaches people how to take better pictures with their phones in addition to the photo prompts. 
• Healing is done by going through the pain, and these exercises can help with that. 
• Dena asks how people can contact and reach out to Carey.
• Carey says that people can contact her through her website, and on her Instagram.  She also has a separate website for sisters and survivors.
• Carey discusses pain, and she shares “alchemizing the pain” which hopefully gets transmuted into more of a positive impact. It is taking pain and optimizing it into purpose. 
• Dena asks if the bipolar disorder diagnosis was freeing, or causing her pain.
• Carey discusses how she saw a maternal psychiatrist, and how the woman recommended that Carey does not have kids. Carey decided to try to have kids. She ended up having a couple of miscarriages, but she kept trying to have a child. 
• Carey discusses her third hospitalization, which was after the birth of her son. She suffered from postpartum psychosis.
• After this, she knew she needed to do something to help others avoid this experience. 
• She became incredibly strong. She dug deep, and found this strength. 
• When you assume your worth, you also see value in other people. You reinforce the idea that there is strength and worth in every single person. This is what Carey learned throughout her Bipolar disorder. 
• Carey says that the stigma surrounding Bipolar disorder is huge and hinders her life. She let her bipolar disorder impact her self esteem for a while. Now she is in a place where she realizes who she is.
• Dena asks what her voice inside her head sounded like during this time.
• Carey said that her inner critic’s voice was very loud. Carey has also always been a perfectionist, which has also made it difficult for her. 
• Dena acknowledges the beauty Carey is doing in giving many people a platform to share their stories.
• Dena asks Carey to share with the audience a photography exercise. 
• Carey chooses the topic of gratitude. With photography, a lot of it is about looking at light. Look around you and be aware of your surroundings. Notice where the lights fall. Appreciate and feel gratitude for the light and the beings around you. Sit with that, and think about affirmations before taking the images. Then taking an image can help summon and capture those positive feelings. 
• Carey says when she photographs nature, she uses this affirmation: “I am rooted, but I flow.” Having this affirmation in mind allows one to get their creative juices flowing and using photography as a playful, fun game to help one’s state of mind. 

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• Heidi Johnson
• Non-Profit Founder and Storyteller
• https://spiritualcareguild.org/
• https://tacsc.org/about/
• https://charity-matters.com/
• Heidi Johnson is a non-profit founder, a story teller, and a believer in all things good. She is the executive director of a non-profit called Task, a youth leadership organization. She also has a blog and podcast called Charity Matters where she tells the stories of other non-profit founders. She wants to build a community full of inspiring people.
• Dena asks Heidi to take us back to where her story and passion started. 
• Heidi says that she grew up in a philanthropic family. Her grandmother took care of elderly people, her aunt was a nun. This took a huge part in setting her on her course. A lot of groundwork set her up on this path. 
• There was a specific moment when she got a phone call in the middle of the night that her parents had been in a car accident. They were in their early 60s and they were hit by a bus. Three passed away and the other had extreme brain damage. Her father survived, but unfortunately her mother was killed instantly. Her father was in a coma for a month following the accident. During this time, the outpouring of love she received was so huge and she felt so grateful for the community around her. This was the moment that turned the path for her, and her calling happened later. 
• November 2002 was the accident. Her father had died twice, had countless injuries and broken bones, but he pulled through. Almost exactly a year later following this accident, Heidi got a call from an old friend who needed help from Heidi to become a chaplain for CHLA hospital. He also wanted to create a program.
• Heidi was struggling with young kids and fresh grief. But she ends up taking some of her friends down to CHLA to help out with the chaplain.  
• Heidi met a woman who was there with her son who had been in a tragic accident. He ended up surviving and went home on Thanksgiving. This experience of serendipity was like a lightbulb for Heidi. She felt activated when she heard this mother explain her child’s story. 
• She then realized she wanted in on this project. She then changed the culture of this hospital and has permanently changed it. Spiritual care is now part of the medical team with the chaplains. The chaplains do medical rounds with all of the doctors for the families. 
• Dena asks how she felt when she had this spurt of serendipity?
• Heidi had a feeling of complete knowingness. She felt called and she knew what it was. She knew it was an undeniable experience. Having gone through loss, it was comforting. She felt a connection to her mother in that moment that was so strong. She also felt like it was an opportunity to make something purposeful from the loss. 
• Dena asks if Heidi was praying for this moment to happen, or did it just sort of occur?
• Heidi says it just happened. The year before was just surviving for her. Her grief was debilitating. She was not functional. She just wanted to get through the grief and take care of her children. 
• Dena wants to emphasize that clarity following grief is not always there. Being open to new passions and new opportunities is the best you can do. To be able to open oneself to exploring possibilities is a gift. 
• Heidi says that bad things happen all of the time, and not everybody chooses to do something with it. With loss, there is rebirth. 
• Dena had an epiphany about 6 months after her daughter’s passing. She realized the pain would never go away and she knew she would carry it for the rest of her life. But it’s what you do with that pain. Bad things do happen, but there is an opportunity to make something of it. 
• Heidi says it’s how do you choose to use that pain? It’s there, and it’s not leaving. So what do you do with it and how do you decide how to convert that energy. 
• Energy cannot be created or destroyed. 
• Dena asks when Heidi began to formulate this into a business.
• Heidi says it was immediate. They discussed with some people at the hospital about expanding the spirituality, but they did not have the budget for it. They were very supportive in working with them though. The idea was to create a new program to be accredited with USC. 
• They began to fundraise and founded the non-profit. Doctors also began to donate because they knew how important spiritual care was. Heidi knew that from here, there was no stopping this cause. It was called the Spiritual Care Guild. From there, doors happened to open up left and right.
• Heidi had so many moments where happy coincidences happen. They became incredibly successful in fundraising. She knew that this was the correct path for her because door after door kept opening. 
• Every time she saw this would happen, she knew it was her mother’s energy. 
• Dena asks where it went from there and how it grew.
• Heidi said that they would only hire one chaplain at a time and have 5 student interns. They had two chaplains and 10 students at this point. 
• Heidi explains that being a chaplain is listening, comforting, understanding, and training on these virtues that are a gift. 
• The chaplains also bring homemade cookies, tea, and little quotes to listen to people. They also began mediation. It has evolved to become the best program to support people. The hospital has been nothing but supportive. 
• Dena asks if she has thought about taking this to other hospitals?
• Heidi says that yes, they have thought about it. 
• She then had a calling to do a TV show about her work, but then she transitioned into making a blog. She then started the blog called Charity Matters to interview non-profit founders. She found her tribe. 
• She says that this is the reason that her chaplain group did not spread to other hospitals. 
• Dena asks how she started to reach out to people in the non-profits.
• Heidi would reach out to the founders and try to understand why they began their non-profits. What was their driving force?
• She really wanted to give light to smaller nonprofits to help and highlight them. 
• “One spirit, one soul, one child at a time” is her nonprofits motto. She did not want her organization to be driven by money. 
• There are 1.7 million non-profits in the US. Millions of people do amazing work for all kinds of people. 
• Heidi’s blog is online can be found here: https://charity-matters.com/
• They also launched a podcast on Spotify and Apple. 
• Her day job is running Tacsc which is a youth leadership organization that is 38 years old. She was brought in by the founder who was going to close Tacsc and she was brought in to remodel the company. At the time, they were serving 300 students. College students train high school students, and high school students train middle school students. They teach students leadership skills. They want them to have a goal and a plan, how to communicate a plan, how to be a lifelong mentor, how people look up to you, and most importantly, they teach you cannot lead unless you serve. True leadership is serving from behind the scenes. She has been there for 7.5 years and is now up to 3,500 students. She loves planting the seed of compassion in a child and teaching them how to serve others. 
• Heidi believes that we are all here to serve one another. 
• Colleen says that the common thread through every guest is giving back. This giving back feeds our souls and perpetuates happiness and joy. 
• Heidi says that it is addictive because she loves to help people so much. She wants to help the helpers. 
• Dena asks Heidi for her final words. 
• Heidi says that we are all just shining our light where we can. We all have that light and can activate it. Everybody has a gift to give, however they want to give it to the world. She is here to remind people of that. 

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Bex Burton, Relationship Coach: Focus on becoming deeply connected and experience fulfilling, loving relationships.

https://www.bexburtoncoaching.com/

• Bex Burton is a relationship coach who helps deeply connected women experience fulfilling loving relationships.
• Today, they are discussing fiercely independent women and their love lives. 
• Dena asks Bex to go back into her life and talk about where her passion and purpose bloomed from. 
• Bex says it’s been a journey. There have been finite moments nudging in this direction, but the origins of it came from her own love life. 
• She was trained at an early age to be an emotional eater. She was a young person who was overweight and felt invisible to men. In her last year of college, she became vegan and lost a lot of weight. She then was beautiful and had never had that experience before. She got a lot of male attention and had no idea what to do with it. 
• She was misguided in relationships. Over the course of a decade, she had three significant long term relationships that all ended the same way. After this third breakup, she decided she was doing more harm than good, and she wanted to figure love out before she got into another relationship. 
• She was 22 years old when this was going on. A lot of her personal value was wrapped up in the male gaze. She finally felt worthy and as if she had value. Looking back now, she knows that was not the truth but it is how it felt to her. She was like a kid in a candy shop.
• Dena asks what Bex learned through these relationships. 
• Bex said she knew she was the common denominator in these similar failed relationships. She learned that she was the one who contributed to the dissolution of these relationships. She then took a hard look at how she was showing up, what were her expectations, what was she doing in response, etc. 
• She discovered she was entering relationships by default and because they made sense, rather than cultivating and creating a relationship by design. 
• She learned she was not being intentional with relationships. 
• Dena asks how she learned to bring these intentions into her own life? Colleen asks if she went to counseling, read books, etc?
• Bex said after this third relationship, she wanted to look at how she was showing up to relationships. 
• She then had a relationship where things started to shift. She realized she wanted an integrated partnership and this man was not giving her that. 
• She went to a lot of therapy, she read a lot of books. Continuing to fail opened her eyes to what she wanted as well as taking the ownership that it was her responsibility to make her own vision. 
• Dena asks if when Bex sought out help, did she know what she was seeking help for? Or did it take her a long time to figure out what was wrong? How did she unpack all of it?
• Bex says that coming out of the third disastrous breakup, she was very confused. She then thought she was gay because she could not make it work with men. She was trying to solve this problem, but now she can look back and see that her energy was just twisted up. She was coming into the relationship fiercely independent instead of creating a unique balance with a masculine partner and allowing a space for a man to be a man. 
• Colleen asks where this patterning came from?
• Bex said it was childhood programming. She had a great upbringing, and inherited the best tools that they gave her. Her parents had a very traditional relationship; her father was the breadwinner and her mother was a stay at home mom. Her father was not emotionally available to her. Her dad spent a lot of time with her brother. He was physically present, but not emotionally. She did not develop the skills and tools to relate to a masculine male. She also got some manipulative narcissism from her mom that she began to realize from childhood. 
• She developed people pleasing tendencies and co-dependencies.
• Women are able to be successful and driven outside the context of a relationship because we get kudos and validation. At the same time, we are frequently driven to that success because we feel we are trying to prove our value in the world. We then take that same framework into a relationship and it wreaks havoc because we project these issues onto their partners. 
• It’s important to own up to these patterns and then create a life that you want.
• Dena asks how Bex was able to create actionable change from recognizing these patterns? How did she take the next step once she realized she was part of the problem?
• Bex says this quote: “It’s not your fault, but it is your responsibility.” We cannot raise children without influencing them negatively in some way. It’s not our fault that these frameworks exist, but it is our responsibility to recognize them and lean into how we can do differently. 
• Bex wanted to reclaim her life and really tune into what she wants. She had an absolute certainty that she desired a 100% full integrated partnership. Her past relationships had only been 80%. 
• It was clear to her she was done playing around with exploring. She had her fun. If she wanted to engage with a man, she wanted it to be mutual and integrated. Three months after that clarity came through, she met the man who is now her husband. It was clear to her she had found her match.
• Dena asks if Bex was able to learn things from each relationship that she was able to take to the next relationship? Dena also wants people in the audience to realize that sometimes even just learning something from an experience is so important, and learning what you like and don’t like.
• Bex said her experience with that was a bit more in hindsight. Looking back, she is able to realize things she liked about specific men, she also found in her husband. 
• Bex says there is something we take away from every single date, relationship, or even a glance across the room. There is a gift and blessing in those moments. There is a reflection of ourselves as well as the other person. 
• Bex leads her clients through this. She has them ask 4 questions.
• 1. How did I love or appreciate how this person showed up in my life?
• 2. What do I love and appreciate about how I showed up in this experience?
• 3. How would my beloved show up differently, or bigger? What would have I preferred?
• 4. How would I show up differently for my beloved?
• Bex believes in the richness in experiences and everything in our lives is a stepping stone to our ultimate goal. 
• Dena discusses a twenty-something who discusses the difficulties of dating. Dena asks if Bex coaches younger people, or if she prefers to coach people who have had more experience?
• Bex says that she finds her work shines best with women who are clear about what they do NOT want. Typically her clients are in their 30s, 40s, and 50s. 33-65 is her sweet spot.
• Dena asks Bex about her work and when she knew she had enough knowledge to help others and create a business about it.
• Bex says it was not linear. Bex said her and her husband would hold talks about how to be with a strong partner. About two years into their relationship, they packed up and moved across the country and started a new life in Colorado. She hit a wall because her workshops were not as successful in Colorado. She wanted to make a bigger impact. 
• She enrolled herself in business and coach training to try to make something happen. 
• It was difficult, but she is very grateful for the experiences along the way. 
• Bex incorporates dance into her work because she was a dance teacher in New York.
• Bex discusses her online dance party she hosts weekdays that she calls “Break and Shake.” This was born out of the pandemic. She is an extrovert at heart, and her heart was breaking. She knew that the world needed to dance and move if we were going to be locked down. She decided to host this 10 minute dance party every weekday. 
• The sign up is on her website. You can sign up and get emails about it. Details can be found here: https://www.bexburtoncoaching.com/breakandshake
• They dance to all kinds of music, but mostly house remixes of 80s songs
• Bex also does private work with mostly single women who come to her with clarity and a picture of what they want and don’t want. This is 1-on-1 coaching. She offers a very affordable price. She believes it should be accessible. She only works with a handful of women at a time, but she is happy to accept applications from people. She also offers a free discovery call which is a 1 hour phone call where you can talk to her and assess if you need her coaching. Her preference is to work with women 3-6 months at a time. You deal with limiting beliefs and energetics you bring to the table.
• The 10 minute dance parties are free. Bex also incorporates body work with her clients that she coached, especially when working through complex emotions. The body is a powerful way to move through hard emotions. 
• Bex is also hosting a masterclass. It will be twice a month about how Fiercely Independent Women Attract and Grow Lasting Love. She will share 3 critical keys for attracting lasting love and how to mitigate difficulties. 
• Dena asks if there is something specific that fiercely independent do in their relationships?
• Bex will be teaching the queen’s mindset and learning how to shift our mindset to be in alignment with the frequency of love. 
• Dena asks Bex for her parting words.
• Bex says that to any fiercely independent woman listening to this, do not deny yourself of your desire for love. The love that we have the capability of creating in our lives is a direct reflection of the loving relationship we have with ourselves. Our primary focus should be loving ourselves and creating a deeply loving relationship with oneself. Understanding needs and emotions and authenticity. She is a firm believer in how we do anything is how we do everything. 

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Soul Seeker Sisterhood

Jennifer Serenity and Heather Hanson

Co-Founders & Co-Directors

Discover your highest self to lift the vibration of the planet

https://www.soulseekerssisterhood.com/

https://www.facebook.com/soulseekerssisterhood/

https://www.instagram.com/soulseekerssisterhood/

Tweets by SoulSeekerSis

• To empower the planet by empowering women to find their higher self and fulfill their higher purpose
• Jennifer Serenity and Heather Hansen, co-founder and co-directors.
• Be authentic, succinct, grow their group of sisters and sisterhood
• The first time we have had two guests
• Where did you start blooming with your passion?
• Heather, goes back into when she was in the womb.  Her Mom was doing a process called rebirthing.  She has been around spirituality since she was born.
• Jennifer felt out of place when she was little, and was a seeker of higher wisdom and liked older people.  She got into a lot of trouble. She turned her power into passion which is to help people and turn control into being a good listener.
• Heather had rebellion about what she was brought up with.  Where did you go with that rebellion?  She fell into a mainstream mindset.  She went with the culture.  She paired up with friends that had the normal parents.  She had a foot in it but didn’t embody it.  
• She used the tools when things got hard.  She would abandon them and then go back to them time and time again.
• Jennifer, as a child your parents thought you were meddling.  How did you bridge the gap between what people thought and when you wanted to help?
• When she was a child she was trying to bring out her genius.  It was when she became an adult that it was when she could get coached to see how her controlling behaviors were getting in the way of her dreams.  
• She suffers from OCD.  She reached out to her Mom Cathy, who was a relationship coach.  She wanted to transform like her mom did.  Laura Doyle helped her transform.
• What are some tips to transform from control issues?
• She would love to touch upon self care.  She can only control herself.  She discovered this when she had a child.  
• Why don’t you try skills on your kids?  Trying this on her kids is what she did.  She had to reimagine what self care was.  It is the #1 thing to take care of yourself before your children.  You have to take good care of yourself. 
• Heather is adulting and uses these tools for physical and mental healing from when she was a child.  It felt like coming home.  There was a fear that she wouldn’t be accepted.  She felt she wouldn’t be attractive to a man.  She felt she wouldn’t be accepted.  She thought, I am not going away again.  She had to stay authentic and true to herself despite the risk of losing someone she loves.
• What event happened to make you realize that there was more to you?  Did you know you were holding yourself back?  When hard things happen, it makes you realize.  She was not surrounded by spiritual people so she didn’t notice.  She needed to meet some new people.
• In order to go up, you have to give up.  Give up old thinking and patterns and sometimes, it means giving up people. 
• What brought the two of you together?  Heather has a book club she has been running.  When COVID hit, they couldn’t meet anymore and she was pregnant.  She had a Mom’s group as well.  She met Jennifer and things aligned.  COVID allowed them to have more sisters and she had great ideas.  They just clicked.  They realized that they were supposed to do more in the world. The astrologer came in and read the stars and told them what their divine purpose was.  They were to be a healing force in the world.  Jennifer said, “I can help you!”  We became business partners!
• Jennifer, when you came into this group, what attracted you to the sisterhood?  She was scrolling Facebook and saw Heather and she wanted to be like her!  They friended on Facebook and she was creating a membership website on her own and working with women and coaching them as well.  What she found in her own work is that there was a missing link.  She didn’t want to do this alone.  She needed Heather.  She dismantled her business and she friended Heather and it was a natural fit.  Jennifer resonated with Heather.  They both found out that they both did Landmark Education and they both are very close to their Moms.  She respected that about her.  She wanted to be shining and glowing.  
• You joined the forces and you said the word mission.  What is it?  It is more than a book club now.  We are turning pain into passion.  We provide meaningful connections for a spiritual and educational mission.  Women don’t know they have a purpose.  They are a source to create abundance that enhances all walks of life.  
• The book club will be a foundation and important.  
• The astrologer answered it for us.  We are centered around community which is why the book club works.  There is accountability with the book club.  
• If we were to have a jeanie and have three wishes and what is the vision?  Dena wants to give an opportunity to our audience.
• What is your award you want to receive when you are older?  A global award for women empowerment.  A humanitarian lifetime achievement award.
• Women have been suppressed for thousands of years.  We have a female vice president.  Let’s empower one another.
• The end picture is that we founded a counsel.  They have been training to help women in a virtual world.  They teach them the minutia to help them get their passion out into the world.  It is a safe sanctuary to shine your light safely in the world.  Uplifting women to come into their soul’s purpose.
• What are your parting words?
• The book club is free.  They read one every month.  They go deep into the books and have workshops.  
• They have a podcast, youtube channel and website. They have a membership program that will help them read books in a new way!  They will give you the tools to become successful learners and growers!

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• Amy Garvey
• Be Brave, Sell Yourself and Get Results!
• Freelance Copywriter, Content Manager, Web Content Developer, Branding Specialist, Sales and Marketing Wordsmith, and Proofreading and Editing Professional.
• https://www.agcopywrite.com/
• Where did your passion start? In the 4th grade she won a creative writing contest and was able to audit a college course.  She heard Maya Angilou speak.  
• She needed to write.  It was her form of self expression.  This was her outlet.  Her mother was a teacher and read to her constantly.  
• She felt called.  
• She has had emotional issues over the years and writing helped her just like when Dena lost her daughter and it allowed the grief to get out of her being.  It passed through her.
• Was it a positive voice in your head?  It was mostly creative writing.  She is making it into a children’s book.  It is about two socks who get separated in the laundry.  Amy is so chill.  
• She daydreams and then turns it into writing.  How are her rituals.  It happens long before she sits down at the keyboard.  And this is why she doesn’t charge by the hour.
• Her process to write is the same as Colleen’s work as an artist.
• She thinks in words.  She spells words out in her head as people talk to her.  Things stick with her.
• She has a morning routine that she sticks to.  She gets up very early.  She spends two hours of my time every morning.  
• Hal Elrod, wrote the Miracle Morning which sounds just like your routine.  This fuels her creativity.  Yoga, reading, bible work, journaling.
• Find the time to fill your cup.
• If your cup gets empty, you need to fill it.
• What led her to become a copywriter?  It laid dormant for a while.  She was in direct sales.  She started writing a trade publication.  Then another trade publications picked her up.
• Her work is well researched and well written.  That is her MO.  It is hard to do humor in writing.
• Marketing is usually the biggest hurdle.  It is hard for people to get your vibe.  
• How do you write for others?
• Ask questions in your writing!  No yes or no questions.  You want the client to talk and tell you about themselves.
• She needs to write in other people’s voices.  
• How do you bring out a voice in us?  She would start about what our hobbies are?  What led us to do the podcast.  Finding out what someone’s passion is.  A lot of people don’t know what their passion is.
• Is it about the customer?  You want to be yourself.  You want them to get to know you.  The material is about THEM.  They are interested in features and benefits.  
• You need to address their wants so you can give them what they need.
• They live the problem that they are solving.  
• The avatar needs to be specific but we need to know what they value.
• Go as if from the reverse.  Who is going to buy it?  Who is it going to fit?
• Do they go out to eat?  Are they spendthrifts?  Finding your customer!
• This is tangible.  People can put into action and identify themselves and the client.
• How does someone work with you?
• Two packages • Done for You or Done with You • and a one off are available
• She does graphic design as a content manager
• She will write to an audience and design a call to action. It could be to sell a story!
• It was hard to be a freelance copywriter and she went full time with it this past August
• What is your favorite ad copy to write?  She likes landing pages and sales pages.  Longer copy sells better! 
• Do you use formulas?  Feel, felt, found?  Or is yours different.  Audience combined with the client and the interaction determines what she writes.
• How did she get the courage to go out on her own?  She was fed up.  She took the time to figure it out.  She had loaded a full pipeline! Good copy is good copy!  It is evergreen.
• In the trenches of running your own business…. Is it scary?  Share words of wisdom.  If she has a month of cushion, she feels comfortable.  You have to trust in yourself!  She is desirable in the marketplace.  
• What kind of energetic state do you need to be in to do your best work?  The back of the brain needs time to get rattled around and have free time to just be creative and think. 
• Honor the times where you can’t work and have no ideas.
• You created a space for you to have clear thoughts and a physical space as well!
• There is a formula to the thoughts and creativity on paper!  It isn’t solely creative… it is logical sometimes.  Set aside time to work on the work.  
• How long is your production funnel?  2-3 weeks is a general timeframe!
• Tell us about your course.  One is a mini course.  Powerhouse persuasion about writing copy.  The other is still in the works.  The copy write Course.  How to write when you don’t know how to write.  It happens between the head and the hand.  And sometimes there is a disconnect.  Most people haven’t written for 20 years!  The more electronic we get the less we have to write.  It takes a lot to get someone else into the emotional space of someone else.  Amy is great at self care.  It was all trial and error.  It was about figuring out what works.  It takes a lot of self awareness.
• Parting words?  Be brave.  If it doesn’t work, you can crawl into your little hole!  Amy went with what is internal!  That is powerful!

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Isabella Gianatiempo
Neuroscience student, USC

• Isabella Gianatiempo is a student at the University of Southern California, where she studies a full range of Neuroscience subdisciplines.
• Today she will be talking about how to use your brain to your advantage. 
• She is double majoring in Neuroscience and Health and Human Sciences.
• Dena asks Isabella to go back to what started her on this path of Neuroscience and Human Sciences. 
• Isabella says that she had no idea what to study when it came time to pick a major for college. 
• In her junior year of high school she worked in the special education classroom where she would help them with everyday activities such as counting money, doing laundry, etc. Most of all, she was their friend.
• There was no specific moment that struck her that she wanted to study Neuroscience. It more occurred to her when she was researching majors at universities she was applying to when she realized that Neuroscience would be a good fit for her. 
• Isabella was very curious about what neural differences made those kids that way. 
• This excitement led her down the path of wanting to study Neuroscience.
• Colleen asks what Neuroscience is?
• Isabella says that our brains help us sleep, eat, speak, feel, move our bodies, and remember things.
• It is the command center of our body, it is a very “selfish” organ because it takes the most amount of energy. It is most important that we take care of it.
• Neuroscience is the brain, the connections within it, and how they work. It is more than that; it emcompasses linguistics, biology, chemistry, physis, and human biology.
• It is incredible to see how nuanced and technical our brains are and how evolution was able to make us like this.
• Dena asks about neuroplasticity.
• Isabella says it is a very new, up and coming field. It is the notion that our brain has the ability to change. Scientists are learning there are indeed ways to change. 
• Dena asks how we are able to tap into patterns that will allow us to be successful. Will a certain system yield similar results for everyone?
• Isabella says there is not a scientific formula to what helps people achieve happiness.
• A lot of times, our brains are looking for the next best thing. Not only in comparing ourselves to others, but even within ourselves. Humans are conditioned to always want the next rung on the ladder; to graduate college, to then get a job, to then get a promotion, etc. We are programmed to want new things, and we have to rewire our brains to be grateful for the success we have now.
• Dena asks about the innate notion of “wanting.”
• Isabella said that “wanting” was probably not caused by evolution, but more so engrained by society. But, this societal notion tapped into neural networks that were always looking for the next meal and water to keep oneself alive. We have translated this into society today in terms of wanting the new car, the new house, and the new job.
• Because our brain is plastic and can change to a certain degree, creating habits such as regularly practicing gratitude in the form of a walk, a meditation, etc., people can rewire their brains to be happy right now instead of wanting what comes next. 
• Dena asks if we can trick our brains to convince ourselves of something.
• Isabella says that our brains are definitely easily fooled. We must take this into account that when we are “fooling” our brain that we are grateful for what we have instead of what we want, this will allow our brains to rewire and over time it won’t be fooling our brain, we will just believe it.
• Dena asks about instant gratification that social media perpetuates in this day and age.
• Isabella says that dopamine is a neurotransmitter that a lot of people may have heard of. It is a reward that our brain releases when we do something rewarding. 
• This reward system was created in our brain evolutionarily when we would forage, eat food, and feel better. Dopamine would be released and we would be more inclined to do that behavior again.
• Today, we get dopamine from so many things and it can become addicting. We are addicted to the notifications because of the dopamine hit they give us.
• Not only do we need food for our bodies, but food gives us dopamine hits that we are addicted to as well.
• Dena asks if the phones are a form of addiction?
• Isabella says that yes, not only is the content addicting, but even the dopamine hits we get from a simple like on our post or even an email ping are addicting. These likes or notifications are a positive reward for when we release dopamine, so we become addicted to that gratification we receive.
• Isabella says what she tries to do is limit phone use as well as social media use. She recommends 1 hour a day, especially for young adults whose brains are still forming and an addiction could have negative long term effects.
• Dena asks about serotonin and when it is released.
• Isabella says that serotonin is an inhibitory neurotransmitter because it takes away the bad. It is important for our happiness. People with depression and anxiety have decreased serotonin. Serotonin can also bond us to our friends as well as partners.
• Dena asks if we know how to stimulate serotonin?
• Isabella says that a lot of times, people may simply just not have enough serotonin.
• Majority of neurons communicate by releasing neurotransmitters from one to another to indicate what to do. This is done in a place called the synapse. Sometimes within the synapse, there isn’t enough serotonin available. People can take an SSRI which can allow more serotonin to be present in their synapses and therefore they can be happier. 
• Dena asks if a combination of drug treatment as well as mental and physical actions can help to combat depression and anxiety.
• Isabella says that a combination of therapy as well as medication is the most successful form of treatment. Medication can only do so much. When that serotonin is available, what do you do with it? Are you doing the activities you enjoy and spending your time doing things you love?
• The second thing Isabella mentions is that diet is extremely important because our digestive tract has a huge role in our brain. 90-95% of our serotonin is made in our gut. A lot of times, the root of depression can be from peoples guts. People who eat a lot of processed or fatty foods may be experiencing depression. Eating well can help to improve a lot of these depressive symptoms naturally. Often this is not the only solution, but it can help.
• Dena asks Isabella to talk about oxytocin and physical touch.
• Isabella says that oxytocin is a spectacular human that is released in your brain. It is mainly meant for mothers to bond with their children for evolutionary purposes in terms of lineage propagation. Now oxytocin plays a huge role in social and emotional bonding.
• Oxytocin is often referred to as the “cuddle” hormone that gives you the warm fuzzy feeling when you are physically connecting to someone.
• Isabella thinks that hugging is so important because it gives you that great feeling that can also be coupled with dopamine and serotonin. Something so simple as a hug can bring people joy and happiness. 
• Humans need human connection to survive, and oxytocin is our brain’s way to allow us to connect and bond with others.
• Dena asks Isabella to talk about stress and how it impacts our brains.
• Isabella says that when you are stressed, it is typically something that is causing stress such as paying the bills or something at work. Stress’ evolutionary purpose is to allow our sympathetic nervous system to activate to make us run away from a predator who is chasing us. 
• Sympathetic nervous system is our “fight or flight” response, our heart rate increases and we are able to run away from something. Then, when the predator leaves, your parasympathetic nervous system kicks in which is our “rest and digest” response
• In this day and age, it is very difficult for people who are chronically stressed to turn off their sympathetic nervous systems. Our kidneys release a hormone called cortisol which feeds back up to our brain and causes us to keep being stressed, it is a positive feedback loop. This is very bad for our health because it can cause inflammation. When we are in fight or flight response, our digestive system halts in order to send energy to other parts of our bodies, so a lot of times people who are chronically stressed may gain weight.
• Dena asks what strategies we can implement to help that system calm down if we are on that loop?
• Isabella says that going from sympathetic to parasympathetic is difficult, but when you figure out how to do it, it becomes easier.
• Managing stress may look different to everyone, whether it’s mindfulness, breathing exercises, eliminating the stressor, etc.
• Managing stress leads to better health outcomes across the board.
• Dena asks if a certain amount of stress is good to motivate and direct as a guiding light to work towards something. 
• Isabella says that a certain amount of stress is needed to get us out of bed in the morning. It is similar to a guitar string, it needs to be taut enough to where you can play it, but not enough to the point where you cannot play it.
• Our bodies naturally feel stress to get us out of bed or to motivate us to achieve our goals. This is very different than the very stressful heart pounding stress feeling. We must manage this type of stress long term so our health does not decline.
• Dena reiterates the takeaway of knowing that you are the guitar string. If it lacks too much tautness it is bad, and if it is overly tuned, that is also not okay.
• There is a certain level of excitement and joy in terms of some stress, but if it gets too much, it is not joyful. 
• Dena asks if part of tuning in is reading oneself is important?
• Isabella says that oftentimes, stress is not addressed. Doctors often treat the conditions that arise due to stress such as obesity and high blood pressure, but often they do not go to the source and figure out what is causing the stress and how to manage it.
• Emotional regulation and emotional awareness of knowing when to do something about your stress levels in order to have good health. 
• Colleen asks if when we have certain thoughts, are certain hormones emitted? Does this have a role in neuroplasticity in terms of the things we say to ourselves?
• Isabella says she does not know the exact answer to this, but from her personal knowledge is that your brain can be fooled, meaning if you convince yourself “I am very happy right now” etc., over time, our brains are able to release serotonin and dopamine that help contribute to our happiness. This can wire us to get happiness from our thoughts. Positive self talk is very important, which goes along with gratitude. Over time, you will believe it and if you practice it, your brain will change and adapt.
• Dena says how you can retrain your brain when your emotions match your words.
• Dena asks about people who are obsese and why losing weight can be such an uphill battle.
• Isabella says that obesity is the second most preventable cause of death in the world today, this is because of the problems associated with obesity such as heart disease, diabetes, and other things like that.
• Millions of people struggle with this issue that is an epidemic.
• Isabella is not here to give weight loss tips, she is helping to explain the neuroscience behind why we eat and why we search for food which can help make people feel better and be a little bit easier on themselves.
• Dopamine plays a huge role in people who are obeses, which shows that it can be an addiction. Brain scans that measure dopamine levels of obese people look the same as people who are addicted to heroin.
• This shows that obesity can be an addiction and oftentimes, it is not people’s fault. It is a mental disease. Their brains have been wired to continue eating.
• Isabella says that it is just the way your brain is wired.
• Isabella is in a research lab where they are studying the neuroscience of feeding behavior. Her project is studying the aspect of searching for food. When someone is searching for an object such as their keys, it is the same pathway for other novel objects. It is very different for food; if someone were to want to go look for an apple or any other kind of food, it is a completely different pathway. Our food wiring pathways are very different from novel object pathways.
• Dena asks if food can be seen as a drug in our body and if it has the same effects?
• Isabella says that now that we know that we have this separate pathway for food, can we study why this may lead to an addiction that leads to obesity?
• How can we override this pathway?
• This pathway lies in the hippocampus which is a very interesting brain region. This region is specific for learning and memory. It allows us to map our world as well.
• There was a fun study done on London taxi cab drivers who had giant hippocampuses because of how much of the city they had to map in their brains.
• Dena asks about changes to the body before and after kids and why the brain can change in terms of weight loss and other physical changes?
• Isabella says that obesity and food are not just tied to the brain. Metabolism has a huge role in this which is physical. Thyroids could be messed up and could be separate from the brain. The body changes so much with age, the brain does have a role in this, but many times it is the body independent of the brain.
• Dena asks how can people discern if their body is reacting to food like a drug vs a shift with the thyroid or another body part?
• Isabella says it comes down to being in tune to how you feel around a meal. Do you find yourself seeking our high calorie food and ingesting them? How is your relationship with food? Do you need to eat the 10 brownies that are on the table right now? This is different from someone who is eating normally and gaining weight but may not be addicted. It is all about tuning in.
• Dena asks if our gut is important and how it translates into mental health? Is our gut really that big of a deal?
• Isabella says that the basic notion is when you eat good, you feel good. Having a balance is important, though. Allowing yourself to enjoy all types of foods, whole grains, fruits, vegetables, and lean meats is very important for our guts as well as our general well being.
• Dena asks Isabella for her parting words.
• Isabella says that her biggest takeaway for people to know is that a lot of times, these things that are happening to you are not your fault. If you are depressed, anxious, obsese, or in a negative thought loop, it is not your fault. Your brain is controlling you, but you can change. You can find things to do that will help you improve, or even just accepting that your brain is that way and acknowledging that it is ok. Cut yourself some slack and know that sometimes it is your brains fault. But you can change, you can become more positive, and you can rewire your brain. 

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Louise Heite, High Achievement Coach

• Louise Heite is an expert in taking high achievers to their greatest levels of success. She has an interest in human behavior. She will be sharing special tips and tricks with the audience today.
• She is a high achiever coach.
• She is the first international guest iSoulify has ever had!
• Louise is coming from Portugal.
• Dena asks where the purpose to work with high achievers started.
• Louise did competition swimming as a young girl, and this is where it started. She questioned how far she could go and how she could do more and become better. She also wanted to help others find this and push themselves more. 
• Louise said when she was in the sports and still young it took her awhile to believe her strength. 
• Her internal power took awhile to click in herself. It was only three years ago that she realized this. She woke up one day and realized that she wanted to pay attention to her own dreams. She began this dialogue with herself about her own importance. 
• Dena asked if she found it difficult to be a leader.
• She says yes, there is a learning curve to it. One obstacle that remains is that she was brainwashed from working 8 am – 6 pm and never allowed herself breaks. She wanted to tap into what she needed and listened to herself.
• Colleen asks about Louise’s upbringing.  
• Her grandfather would always tell her to work hard which influenced her. She learned how to work hard in running one’s own business and not taking days off. She believes you have to work hard to get what you want in life. 
• Dena brings up the idea of flexibility in the hours we work. There is now the opportunity to work in more flexible hours, but it requires a mental process to free oneself of mental guilt after taking mental breaks. She asks how we work through shifting through this pattern of thinking and acknowledging that it is okay to take breaks.
• Louise discusses productivity and when people are most productive. Different tasks require different energy, and what timelines work best? When are we most productive? Maybe during this time we exercise or take a walk. How do we get to our most productive spot? How do we optimize this and repeat it every single day?
• Louise works with high achievers. Colleen asks Louise to define high achievers.
• Louise says that high achievers are people who are looking for what’s next. They are on the move and want to reach the next level. They have a curiosity for what comes next.
• Colleen asks Louise to walk her through the process of what a high achiever would experience from her training.
• Louise would help them get some clarity in what they want to achieve. What does success look like to you? Is it growing a business? How can we achieve it? Do we need to acquire some new skill sets? Are there other people we need to get involved? It is completely okay to ask for help. We don’t have to do everything on our own. People with specific expertise are sometimes needed. From there, it is the mental game of mastering or changing a mindset to optimize performance. It is also important to notice thinking and question the thinking. Is it helpful? Is it bringing one close to their goal?
• Dena asks if Louise teaches a rule about letting go of work that entrepreneurs do that they love, yet they do not get money from.
• Louise says that this question is important to ask yourself: Is this work bringing me closer to my goal? 
• Dena asks about prioritization within work. 
• Louise says it is important to take a look at how people spend their time during their week. Having this insight will allow people to recognize what time is not productive and what are things that can be outsourced. She wants people to win back time. 
• Dena asks what the experience of moving from country to country has been like and what it has taught her in terms of applying these skills into her coaching business?
• Louise spent 12 years living in London, then New York for 4 years. Her move was work driven because her husband is also an entrepreneur. When she was in New York, she thought of the future she wanted to create for herself and her children. She was missing nature; she wanted to live near the ocean. 
• She learned how to set an intention individually as well as a family. This allowed her to picture her life more clearly and make a decision based upon that. 
• Recently, she moved to Portugal. Her goal was to be near nature and connect with that. The intention was there, and her and her family made it happen and did not let it fall on the back burner. 
• Dena emphasizes the theme of our pursuits in life. When we are intentional, we are living in the present. It is important to be intentional about where we spend our time. 
• Colleen asks Louise to elaborate on “flow.”
• Louise says the flow state is when someone is working and losing perspective on time and space and just fully in the moment. 
• Louise loves to work with a calendar with her clients. She wants them to block off that time for them to be in a flow state. 
• Colleen asks how one gets into a flow state?
• Louise says you can command your mind by setting an intention for the flow state. It takes practice to command flow but once you get good at it, it becomes easier. She also says to give some body cues, such as exercising beforehand or putting distractions away to let your mind know to enter the flow state. 
• Colleen asks if there is a pattern for optimal time management in terms of times to be creative, or for writing, etc. 
• Louise believes everyone has a different clock and that different people need different schedules. 
• A great tool to implement is tuning into emotional effects that certain activities have on us at certain times a day. This is how you know a shift may or may not be needed. 
• Colleen asks Louise to speak to procrastination.
• Louise believes we all have it in us. It is about asking yourself the right questions. What is keeping me from starting this right now? Is something more important? Why am I not doing it right now? Louise says that writing down the three things you have to do in a day, and one of them may be the task you want to procrastinate. It is nice to forget about it once it is written down because it leaves our mind. 
• Dena asks if after writing things down on a to-do list, should there be a day and time to complete it? Or should it be more flexible and intuitive?
• Louise says it takes us being honest with ourselves when making priorities for the day but not micromanaging our lives. 
• Dena asks if being in the coaching role is the push many people need to be accountable for themselves.
• Louise says that yes, this is true. She says in her sessions to ask people what they have achieved because she believes people do not celebrate their wins as much. Then she goes into what they did not achieve and why. Was it procrastination? An emotional issue?
• People listening to this who are struggling with procrastination or poor time management should seek out a life coach and invest in themselves. There is no reason to stop your hopes and dreams if you are struggling. There is always someone there to help support those aspirations. 
• Louise’s parting words are “I am in charge, not in control.” Being in charge is about creating a life that you like. It might not be from day one, but heading on that journey is so important. You are not in control because there are so many factors that are out of our control. We only have control over ourselves and our reactions. If you want to get to the next level, it is never too late. It starts with one small step. Anything is possible. You are more powerful than you can imagine. Sometimes we are scared of our own power, but don’t be scared!

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